


Mean Witches

by andistone



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Mean Girls (2004)
Genre: Comedy, Established Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Established Relationship, M/M, Mean Girls References
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-19
Updated: 2017-10-19
Packaged: 2019-01-19 18:07:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12415239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/andistone/pseuds/andistone
Summary: Eighth Year AUHarry forces Draco to watch "Mean Girls".





	Mean Witches

Yes, I am aware that Harry and Draco would've been eighth years in 1999/2000 and Mean Girls didn't come out until 2004, but just go with it.

Eight Year AU

"I can't believe you made me watch that crap," Draco groaned to his boyfriend after switching off the TV.

"Mean Girls is a masterpiece! A classic of our generation!" Harry protested.

"It's Muggle crap," Draco deadpanned.

"Boo, you whore!"

Draco rolled his eyes and sighed heavily, "Are you going to be like this for the rest of the day?"

"Day?!" Harry cried, incredulously, "Try week!"

"Nooooooo," Draco whined.

"I'm sorry, did I hear 'month'?"

Draco's eyes widened and he immediately shut his mouth. "You wouldn't," he whispered, horrified.

Harry just gave him a cheeky wink and sauntered off to bed.

/* /* /* /*

The next morning went by fairly smoothly, with no references to a particular 2000s movie. Until Charms. Draco answered a question correctly and Harry yelled, "You go, Dray Coco!" 

Draco turned beat red with mortification when the whole room turned to stare at them. He slid down in his seat and threw a glare at Harry.

In Potions, Harry called a bezoar "fetch" and dittany "grool".

When they were leaving Transfiguration, Draco asked Harry if he'd like to go to "The Three Broomsticks" for dinner. 

"I can't go to Three Broomsticks! I'm on an all-carb diet! God, Draco, you are so stupid!" was Harry's response.

"Salazar help me," Draco muttered.

In Defense Against the Dark Arts, Harry reached over and pushed Draco's hair up.

"Your hair looks sexy pushed back," he said. He turned to Seamus Finnigan who was sitting in front of them, "Seamus, will you please tell him his hair looks sexy pushed back?"

Seamus raised an eyebrow at Draco and Draco mouthed, "Ignore him."

When they walked into the common room, Harry announced, "How many of you have felt personally victimized by Draco Malfoy?"

Draco playfully shoved him.

/* /* /* /*

The next day, Draco hoped that the torture was over. Until a pink scarf was wrapped around his neck.

"What the heck?" he cried, trying to get it off of himself.

"It's Wednesday," Harry explained, "On Wednesdays, we wear pink."

True to his words, Harry also wore a pink scarf.

Draco threw his hands up and walked away, "I'm done."

"It ends when you quote Mean Girls!" Harry called after him.

Draco swore that that would never happened.

And he stuck by that when Harry transfigured ears on his head and claimed he was a mouse, "duh". He stuck by that when Harry claimed that people were jealous of him because he couldn't help it that he was popular. He stuck by it when Harry said that Dumbledore's beard was so big because it was full of secrets. But his patience was running low.

"How many things are you going to quote from Mean Girls?" Draco whined during lunch.

"The limit does not exist," Harry replied simply. 

"That's it! You can't sit with me." Draco was prepared to go into a long speech about how he loved Harry, but couldn't be with him while he was acting this way, when he saw Harry's delighted face.

Harry jumped up and hugged him from behind, going on about how he felt "like a proud mother" and how he was "so so happy".

"What the heck? What'd I do?" Draco asked, confused.

"Why, Draco, dear, you said I can't sit with you which is an indirect quote from Mean Girls because Gretchen tells Regina that she can't sit with them."

Draco let out a pitiful sob and let his head fall to the table.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Check out my Wattpad (andistone) for more!


End file.
